Yeah, Right, Whatever

This commentary was a bit of a blast from the past. But, let's see what she had to say first.

The other day at work, some colleagues and I were discussing a chain restaurant known for its scantily clad waitresses. I was taken aback for a moment. "They have the best sports bar in my area," one person said. "I hear they have great Buffalo wings," said another.

It was a moment of disconnect. "But how can anyone go to places like that?" I asked. "What about the objectification of women's bodies?" The what of the who?

My colleagues, many of them young enough to be my offspring, gave me puzzled, bemused looks.

"This is one of those feminist things, isn't it?" someone asked.

"Yes, I'm a feminist. Yes, I did consciousness raising," I said.

"What's consciousness raising?"

She was confused, for a couple of reasons. First of all, the "objectification of women's bodies" isn't what it was back in the day. Society has changed, for better or worse, because of feminism or in spite of it (I think both to both). I mean, the girls at Hooters wear FAR MORE than most of the young hotties at the swimming pools these days. They work there because they get really good tips- there isn't some bizarre slavery ring that forces them to wear those outfits. Second, women, in spite of what you see on the media, have a much better self-image than they did back when you were a young feminist, Debra. Either that, or they have more means to change their appearance.

As for the whole "consciousness raising" thing... never heard of it? Here's Debra's explanation:

How could I describe these little groups of women who met once a week in the 1960s and 1970s, just to talk about their lives, their assumptions, their feelings as women?

How is that different than what groups of women have been doing since... well, since the first women? From sitting around a fire, trying to figure out the best way to cook whatever it was the guys brought back from the hunt to high tea to quilting bees and coffee clatches... this is nothing new. Sorry to burst your bubble, but 1060s feminism did not invent "dishing."

And then we get to this little nugget- the one the feminists could never quite understand:

The young women in my workplace see themselves, no doubt, as equal to the men. But when they get pregnant and have babies, guess what happens? They're still the ones who drop out of the workforce, or work part time, or, more rarely, go back to work full time but are overwhelmed with guilt. I sure don't see that same angst in men too often.

There's a good reason for that. Back in the 70s, feminists were harping on women's rights and how women had been shackled to the home for too long. The problem was that there were many women who wanted to stay at home with their kids, who thought that the greatest career is the housewife. Climbing the corporate ladder was irrelevant to them. They were quiet for a while, and they they had enough. Many (usually conservative) women started speaking up on the joys of motherhood, and the good side of walking away from the rat race. And now, thanks to the feminists and those who consider themselves "traditional feminists" (those who embrace and aspire to all things traditionally feminine... think Proverbs 31 kind of woman), the young women of today can truly see their full range of options. They can climb the corporate ladder, or they can climb the ladder at the playground with their kids. They know the pros and cons of each choice, and neither is put down (too much). (I have my personal opinions on which is the "better choice"... care to guess?)

At the end of her commentary, she wonders if the young women in her office would support an Equal Rights Ammendment. I can only hope not.

Flashback time... in the early 1980s, I was in junior high, and the ERA was a big deal. 35 states had ratified it, and the 1982 (extended) deadline was approaching, and then passed without the necessary 3 states ratifying it. In 1983, I was sitting in my freshman Honors Social Studies class, and somehow the ERA came up. I commented on how pointless ERA was, and one of the guys said, "you, of all people, should be in favor of ERA. Why aren't you?" (Why he thought I, of all people, would be in favor it is beyond me.) I asked him to point out one right in the Constitution that he would have at age eighteen that I would be denied - he could not come up with one. "Then why do I need NOW adding something that's already written there?"

What's sad is that there are still groups who feel we need an ERA. Then again, these are the same groups that think the majority of Americans support abortion on demand any time, any reason. They're convinced that Christian fundies are behind every evil out there. They just don't get it. I guess they never will.