Yeah, Right, Whatever

From what I've been able to tell from the bru-ha-ha going on in the blogosphere this week, Presidential candidates are hiring bloggers to work with their campaigns. Well, sign me up!

Here are my qualifications:

• I am actually a registered voter.
  
• I am familiar with proper grammar and the spellcheck button.
  
• I got all As in my writing classes throughout my education.
  
• I'm a quick study most of the time.
  
• I am a pro-life, pro-gun, pro-military, pro-faith, pro-family, pro-capitalism, pro-school choice, original intent constitutionalist conservative.
  
• I'm a published writer (well... if you include the poetry that was published when I was in high school and the cookbook that's almost finished).
  
• I am a stay at home mom who is considering home schooling again, so I am quite conversant on several topics important to the "average American" who doesn't care much about our foreign policy but does care about taxes and education and medical care.
• I am a book junkie, with a varied interest in reading material.
  
• I am also a political junkie, and I can discuss foreign policy without sounding completely ridiculous.
  
• I've had a blog for over 2 years now, and I've managed to not make a whole bunch of enemies.
  
• I have been accused of being hateful, but that was almost always by a liberal who disagreed with my general position on a given topic.
  
• As a rule, I don't resort to emotional outbursts to get my point across.
  
• I try to attack ideologies, not individuals. (There are exceptions. Most of them revolve around mass-murders and the Religion of Peace.)
  
• Foul and/or abusive language is at a bare minimum here, if at all.
  

Now, if you are interested in hiring me as your campaign blogger, I have a few conditions of my own:

• I may sugar-coat something, but I will not lie for you.
  
• You might not have all of the same platform stands that I do, but you'll have to show me plenty of evidence to convince me to support your view.
  
• I might be willing to do some traveling (especially if you actually get the nomination), but most of my work will be done by telecommuting. I have a cell phone, and I know how to use it.
  
• If you're a liberal, please see my first condition.

So, if you're a conservative candidate looking for a blogger for your campaign, send me an e-mail. I just might be your best bet. (notice, not one f-bomb in this whole post... can you say that about... um... other campaign bloggers you might have heard of lately???)